Quotes in English
KELSO, laughing: „Wouhouhouhouhou! Oh! Yeah! Your sister wants me! I mean you saw her coming on to me right?“
FEZ is about to talk but HYDE keeps him back.
HYDE : „Let him go !“
KELSO: „Remember? I said ‚Hello Laurie‘ and Laurie said: “
LAURIE: „Hello Kelso. I’m waiting and I want you baby, to take me now. I need it bad, I need it all night. And Momma loves her baby. I’m completely naked under this and I’m hot for you Kelso!“
KELSO: „What? You didn’t see it?“
HYDE: „Sounds like your dad is loosing it.“
KELSO: „Jeez, he’s like this now, he’s gonna be a total head case when they shut down the plant. Just gonna be this pathetic guy …“
RED comes in.
KELSO: „With breasts the size of watermelons! Is what Moses said to the Egyptians.“
RED: „Kelso, go home!“
KELSO leaves.
KELSO, into phone: „Jackie, hold on.“
KELSO puts his hand over the upper part of the receiver instead of the lower part.
KELSO: „Okay, I’ll tell her there’s an emergency and I gotta go. She’ll buy that, right?“
HYDE: „Yeah, except for one thing.“
HYDE removes Kelso’s hand and places it correctly over the lower part of the receiver.
JACKIE hangs up.
KELSO: „Jackie, Jackie?“
JACKIE is chatting on the phone.
JACKIE; „Barbara Streisand becomes this huge star, right? But Chris Christopherson could not take it anymore. So he drink and drinks and crashes his car. Isn’t that romantic?“
FEZ is the one listening.
FEZ: „Say yes it is.“
KELSO: Yes, it is.“
JACKIE: „Oh, I just love romantic moves, don’t you?“
FEZ: „Yes I do.“
KELSO: „Yes, I do.“
JACKIE: „You know what would be a good romantic scene in a movie? That night we had by the reservoir, when we went skinny-dipping… Remember?“
FEZ: „No, describe it to me.“
KELSO: „No, describe it to me.“
JACKIE: „Michael, you’re so bad. Okay, the water was really cold. So, when I dove in, well you know!“
FEZ: „No, I don’t know!“
JACKIE: „MICHAEL!“
RICKY: „Why do you want a career at Fatso Burger?“
KELSO: „My girlfriend’s dad owns it.“
RICKY: „Tell me, what do you consider your best quality?“
KELSO: „My eyes. Oh, and I guess my butt too.“
RICKY: „Name something about yourself that you consider to be a weakness.“
KELSO: „Um…“
KELSO leans back on his chair and falls.
RICKY: „Where do you see yourself in five years?“
KELSO: „Rock star. Uh, no, movie star. No, yeah, rock star.“
JACKIE: „Michael, sit. We need to talk.“
KELSO sits down on what he sees to be a waterbed.
KELSO: „Oh-ho…Ahoy Jackie, welcome aboard the U.S.S. Kelso.“